|Slang: Dirty Terms|
Warning! If you are offended by occasional profanity and lots of silly terms for sex, sex acts, genitals, farts, etc, you should probably skip this page.
You have been warned. Any emails objecting to this page's content will be held up to ridicule.
This page contains slang for the following terms. Click any to leap right to them, or just scroll down.
Everyone (almost) finds naughty words amusing, so this is more of a humor page than an internet info resource. These are all terms that I have heard in use, or seen on other websites; I didn't just pull them out of my ass (so to speak).
There are dozens of other internet sites with as long or much longer listings of slang for your naughty bits, but most are regional, and most are organized alphabetically. This page is organized by subject, which I found a much more useful method. In addition, this page has only terms that I thought were funny, or at least really strange. Saying "one-eyed monster" is funny, "dick" is not. If you don't grasp the difference (pun!) then there's not really any way I can explain it to you.
Emails with additional terms are welcome. All terms must pass our exhaustive screening process (making me giggle) before they are added to the list. This ensures the highest quality in potty humor. Send emails here.
Stop now if you get offended. Last warning!
Slang for Vagina
visible through clothing
See Cameltoe.org for the pinnacle of this field of study.
Many of these terms can be turned into intercourse slang by adding "riding the" as a prefix.
for Anal Sex
There is some overlap with male homosexual terms.
Beard -- Woman married to a (supposedly) gay man to help keep him closeted. I.E. Nicole Kidman, formerly.
Frock -- Male equivalent of a beard, also "lavender marriage". See Richard Gere for Cindy Crawford, if you believe the hype.
Remarks after a Fart
Slang for Poo
There's a disturbing strain of poo slang that's based on the presumed color similarity between feces and black people. I had never heard any slang alluding to this prior to posting this page, and starting to get reader emails about it. Yes, I led a sheltered life, though I didn't realize it at the time.
Fingers in both ass and
A woman (or man) who dies their hair, but not all over
Skimpy male underwear
Initially this list was going to just have exhaustive lists of terms for penis, vagina, period, and sexual intercourse. However it got boring and looked like a bathroom stall, so I decided to do just funny/inventive terms, and expand the categories a bit. There are probably an infinite number of possible terms, with more being invented all the time.
An interesting comparison is what's considered obscene in the US vs. other countries. The US is much more uptight about anything sexual, and more forgiving of violence. This isn't exactly a news flash; it's practically the central criticism of the MPAA, (the US movie rating system) for the past 10+ years.
For example, in the UK they have full frontal nudity, profane language, and explicit sexual content on public TV (albeit only on some shows and generally late at night), while in the US, network TV is quite self-censoring and it's just in recent years that a few programs have begun to show partial rear nudity. The spoken language varies a lot also, in the UK most any curse word is allowed in conversation; perhaps not over biscuits and tea with your nanna, but you get the picture. There's a lot less concern in the UK about saying something naughty in mixed company. Certain words, such as "cunt", which is profane in the UK, but not especially so, it's more akin to "bitch" or "pussy" there, while in the US it's about as profane a word as there is.
If you'd prefer the UK state of affairs, it's hard to say who is responsible for the vocabulary differences in the US, but our wimpy TV and movies (where violence is far more acceptable than sex) is almost entirely due to right wing Christians presurring gutless TV networks/movie companies. You have those groups to thank/blame (depending on your PoV) for our current state of affairs.
The US lags well behind the UK in funny naughty terms. The only ones we (Americans) have are idiotically-childish terms, or else variations of common vulgarity. Lots of the most inventive and amusing terms here are ones I've heard from UK slang.
If you want more collections of naughty words, just run a Gooooooooogle.com search on the subject, and you'll see dozens of sites with lists of useful terms.
If you've got slang terms, send them in and if some get added I'll add your name or alias here. Your proudest moment, I'm sure.
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