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Miscellaneous Food Reviews
rom time to time I talk about food away from a restaurant context. Such updates are archived on this page.

More recent additions are on top. 

 

August 22, 2003

One of the more annoying TV commercials going now is for these new breakfast bars from Kellogg's, or whatever cereal company it is that makes Cheerios. The commercials have the prototypical TV mom (perpetually wearing shiny slacks and a button up sweater, with sensible shoulder-length hair) and her prototypical white TV family; kids racing around, white-collar husband setting off to work, etc. You can probably throw a shaggy hip-high dog in there too, more often than not.

Anyway, the commercials show their prototypical suburban house on a sunny morning, with the kids racing out the doors to walk to school with their friends, the husband staggering into his suit coat with a briefcase in one hand, etc.  Basically Leave It To Beaver, but in color. But woe!  The children and already overfed husband have slept too late to consume a proper breakfast, and if mom doesn't intervene quickly, all will be lost!  So she hurls a bowl of milk and cereal across the house, frisbee like, and through the magic of computer animation the spinning bowl, milk and cereal trailing behind it, comet-tail like, flies right to the daughter, or son, or husband, perhaps skipping off something like a fish tank on the way.  And when it arrives at the destination, the bowl of milk and cereal (and even a metal spoon too, if my memory serves me) magically morph into a shiny foil-wrapped, factory-sealed, granola-bar sized rectangle of breakfast goodness.

Basically it's a Rice Krispies Treat with a different type of cereal.  In this case Honey Nut Cheerios.  It wasn't bad, sort of stale-tasting, probably from whatever marshmallow-y goo they use to adhere the crunched up bits of honey nut cheerio into a stable rectangular shape.  If it wasn't so obvious that they baked this stuff in pans the size of Escalades before chopping them into rectangles and wrapping them up, it would be more fun to eat.  It's a bit too much of the "may your breakfast appear to have been extruded" vibe for my taste.  So to speak.

The middle has a sort of creamy ooze in it, but not creamy enough to actually savor, as if it were dessert-y cream.  It's just slightly viscous, like whipped cream left out overnight.

I was given one by Malaya's mom to have as a snack when the circumstances demanded, and ate it mostly out of curiosity.  I wouldn't want another one, personally, and would actually enjoy a bag of dry cereal more than one of these factory-wrapped things.

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