"Where did I come from?"

Besides being one of the first troubling questions your six year old asks, it's a question that most webmasters are interested in. How did visitors find their site for the first time? Where did they look at when they first arrived?  What did they think about it?  How long was it until they returned? What made them become a regular visitor (or not)?

In order to try and answer some of these questions, as well as satisfying my curiosity and creating a potentially-interesting site page, I'm trying to find out the answers. Like the story of how you lost (or perhaps will lose) your virginity, the tale of your first time is interesting.  Send me the story of your first time visiting this site and I'll post it on this page, crediting you by whatever name you want to admit to.

Ideally, your account will cover as many of the following points as you can remember/are relevant/you can be arsed to write about.

• Where did you see the link to this site?
  • If you came from a search engine, what were you searching for?
• What were your first impressions?
• What page(s) did you first view and what did you think?
• Are you a regular visitor?
  • If so, how many times did you visit before you became one?
• How often do you return? Daily?  Weekly?  Monthly? Whenever it strikes your browsing fancy?

If you aren't in the mood or don't remember all of this, just send in whatever you remember from way back whenever you first started visiting.  It's interesting for me and others to read about.

May 2, 2005
The first time I came across your sight was about two months ago. I was searching through Agnostic and Atheist sights because I’ve always considered myself Atheist but didn’t know what Agnostic was and wanted to make sure that in my ignorance I wasn’t calling myself the wrong thing. The name blackchampgne peaked my interest so I took a look. Religion vs. Reality was the first link I went to because it fit my theme of that day and I really liked it. It seemed to me that you have the same opinions concerning religion as I do. And sarcasm; well good sarcasm is even funnier than watching somebody fall down the stairs so I was digging your replies to the articles. This is my second time on and I just checked out the My First Time link so I’m obliging. I despise computers because I don’t understand them and they make me feel stupid, but when I do get on one I will definitely stop by again.

-Dobby

I love his closing line about computers. I think most of us can relate to that feeling at times.

Want one that's short and not especially sweet? 

October 13, 2004
Yeah, hi.

I found this page by doing a Google search of janky + Etymology.

The end.

-Gumby145

After I added the March 30th entry below, and commented that it was about the first "My First Time" entry ever to actually use the above bullet point format... the next three used that format as well.  Be careful what you ask for, since you just might get it.

May 13, 2004
-If you came from a search engine, what were you searching for?
Was searching for info on a local band called Go Fast via MSN.com for the purpose of looking for inspiration in finding a name for our band.

-What were your first impressions?
At first I thought it was just another stupid band name rating site. But then... you sucked me in... giving Rage Against the Machine a 10. After reading a bit, I was caught off guard by the witty, sardonic repartee or meaningless drivel; can't decide which yet.

- What page(s) did you first view and what did you think?
Um, just answered that question. But I did make it through some of the serial killer, conspiracy theory and daily archives pages. Won't say they were riveting but they were... interesting.

- Are you a regular visitor, and if so, how many times did you visit before you became one?
Not yet, we'll see. You kept my attention for about an hour... and that's saying something for a ping-pong surfer like me.

Keep up the good work,
Q

 

May 5, 2004
-Where did you see the link to this site?
-From the dii.net site when looking for the holiday special stories. they were archived on BC.com and I started to browse around

-If you came from a search engine, what were you searching for?
-Swedish goat pr0n. oh wait ;D

-What were your first impressions?
-Greatly entertaining blog with a wonderful sense of humor and wit

-What page(s) did you first view and what did you think?
-the stories were the first things I read. after reading the D2 holiday special stories, I started looking at the other stuff and got very interested and appreciative of your work. from there I started browsing around the various articles/essays/ramblings that you have archived, and then started to reading the blogs in earnest and coming back regularly.

-How many times did you visit before you became a regular visitor?
-I was pretty much hooked from the first day. I enjoy reading about people's opinions on things, especially if it's written a) humorously, b) not in a dull boring monotone-ish way that's just "let's just state our info and be done with it," and c) wit + intellect = general aura of wonderfulness ;D

-Do you visit daily, often enough to read each daily update in a clump a week at a time, or just every month or so, when it strikes your browsing fancy?
-More than daily ;) depends though. I'll try to check every day at least once in the evenings, since by then the blog will be up if the site gets updated. usually I end up checking back two or three times a day, sometimes hunting through the blog archives and just reading random entries. a huge plus to the blogs and what engages readers I believe is the essay/thoughts/etc portions- taking various interesting news pieces and talking about them. add the fact that it's done intelligently and not by some bone Joe Sixpack and with great humor, and you've got a big success (quick note in case you didn't know- bone meaning stupid/idiot, used as an adjective. I'm rather fond of using English slang ;p ) 

Elsha-of-IEL

 

May 3, 2004

- Where did you see the link to this site?
Result #13 when I searched for "hotornot key" on Google.

- If you came from a search engine, what were you searching for?
hotornot key

- What were your first impressions?
No no no, this isn't want I'm looking for... Ooh wait, this looks
interesting actually...

- What page(s) did you first view and what did you think?
http://www.blackchampagne.com/hotornot.shtml ... and I thought "Wow, he writes a lot. I think I'll take a look at the home page."

- How many times did you visit before you became a regular visitor? Not a regular visitor yet... but I suspect I may become one.

- Do you visit daily?
First day here! Next week I'll try to remember to do this again, and see what comes up.

Regards, John Blackbourn of JohnBlackbourn.com fame!

This is about the first entry ever that actually used the above bullet point listing as a guideline.  I have got to set up a little form with blanks to enter this stuff... someday.

March 30, 2004

Where did you see the link to this site?
DiabloII.net.

What were your first impressions?
The site is supremely entertaining with its intelligent yet humorous style.

What page(s) did you first view and what did you think?
Unfortunately I cannot recall, but best guess would be the blog and QotD.

How many times did you visit before you became a regular visitor?
Two or three times.

Do you visit daily, often enough to read each daily update in a clump a week at a time, or just every month or so, when it strikes your browsing fancy?
If I see a new blog I read it, and I visit the site everyday, often times more than once a day.

March 26, 2004
Nothing interesting in my story .. but you asked for it so here you go.

I was reading Behind the Veil #11 and thought it provided a lot of insight into the creation of games. Saw the link to the forum so I clicked on it. The only comments were yours and one other. Then I noticed a link in your signature so decided to click on it. Tada .. here I am. 

Since I am sadly anal in my approach to things I have been reading your site from top to bottom .. and this "My first time .." link was right near the top, so I have not even read squat on your site yet.

I will try to be interesting at this point and say that I may write more if anything on your site interests me. Flippant and borderline rude ... I see a lot of famous people use that attitude and they are called interesting so I am trying it.

Beyond

 

March 17, 2004
I first came across your site around last April from where else but the d2 site. A few months before some of my net gaming buddies had decided to start playing d2 again after we were starting to get bored of Starcraft, so I searched around and quickly found Diabloii.net which I/we began to regularly visit. After a while I/we started reading your columns (hilarity ensued) well one day I was bored so I checked your bio page. "It is updated daily, has next to nothing to do with Diablo II, and is almost certain to offend."...how could I resist such great third person *cough* promotion so I decided to check it out. I don't remember what you were blogging about exactly that day, just that I was impressed with your cynical yet realistic POV on it, which became a constant theme every time I looked back. In about a month I was a constant reader, up till summer, then started again in like Oct. I've really enjoyed your site and I like your writing technique, I have also taken amusement in your drastic change in attitude since moving in with Malaya (for the better I might add) I was always looking for a good excuses to write but never found one until you reminded me of that page the other day. o well

-6227
(yes I'm but a number)

 

March 12, 2004
Well my first time....I think I stumbled across it a few 
months ago, probably through a link somewhere to the slang 
sections. Yeah and so I spent a few days, weeks, coming back 
to to the slang and updating my own feeble slang collection. 
Then I actually started reading blogs, etc, and while I think 
a lot of Flux's invective re advertising and cultural theory 
etc is fairly predictable (sorry but I have a media degree), 
its still great to see / interesting / amusing / distracting 
enough to keep me from doing any work. The other reason I 
liked your slang pages was because they were all nicely in 
English, so my french boss over here had no idea what I was 
reading when he walked past. How convenient. 
Anyway well done and I'll probably keep coming back, when 
distraction beckons.

-Sarah

My great backlog of emails to sort, dating from June 2003 to January 2004, was entirely lost in a mail client crash in mid-February, 2004.  Included in that 8 months of email were numerous "my first time" mails; all lost now, unfortunately.

May 30, 2003
I just landed on this site a couple of hours ago. Was a bit reluctant to click the link in the forum thread on dii.net about your day testing 1.10. Homesites make me feel a bit voyeurish (Never thought about checking your dii profile while enjoying the decahedrons).

This one has a very pleasant layout. The bombed Baghdad bunker never did exist. Ok, Flux's political preference noted. Band name ratings. Went through them all, from A to Z ( 'This is a semi-objective determination' , hrmpf). Interesting read, Flux is at his best when he's semi-objective. He's able to express his subjectivity in such a way that now and then a glimpse of the objective truth shines through. I can't understand why Neil Young isn't on the list. Where Did You Come From? Well, who am I to deny a favor asked. I read through the submissions until Malaya's, followed the in this update (wonderful piece of real-life soap, although I couldn't bring myself to read the chat log beyond the first lines, I guess I will in time) and wrote this mail. Time will tell how often I'll return to blackchampagne (Site name ratings: Too early to judge, I haven't seen the black side of the site yet. Sounds good though, can you use it as spaceship fuel?).

-Snuis

 

May 26, 2003
So here's the story of how I found your site. On another blog's message board there was a question asking what was your favourite blog. Someone listed your weblog as their favourite so that is how I came to visit. The page I viewed first was your regular blog but over time I've been to some of your articles, your photos, your links to other sites. All very interesting I might add. I came to the site two or three times before I became a 'regular' visitor and I'd say that on average I visit once every two days. The entry I found most amusing was the one on the antics you and your colleagues get up to in the workplace. I can totally relate. I work in an office and we have a dartboard that causes a few disasters. Actually, it's mostly the dartboard and I, not anyone else as I seem to be the only one who manages to miss the board on a regular basis. 

Anyways, feel free to visit my weblog sometime, I love having visitors!

-Amie

I like how she segues from the topic of finding my blog to asking me to check out her blog.  Hey, at least there was a segue, plenty of people don't even bother to pretend any interest in your site before they start asking you to visit or plug theirs.  And since I've done pretty much the same thing that Amie does here, I can hardly complain.

May 4, 2003
Regarding the finding of BC, there was a fairly natural progression of events. I watch the WC3X beta forum for the purpose of knowing the current issues in the beta, though I don't use it myself. I ended up going the the b.net news page at one point and saw the stuff about the new patch that's being released, which, for me, is far more interesting than WC3X. I went to diabloii.net to find out some things about this, as I know that they have a far better information release system than Blizzard. I saw some of the editorials, among which was the Decahedron. When I checked the author info on you after reading every Decahedron (yes, all of them), I figured I check out your real website. So, basically, I came from dii.net, though I really seem to have come from b.net... Yeah, I'm strange like that... And I have a lot of time on my hands. Getting ill with something that makes you an insomniac often does that to people.

-Brent

April 2003
I saw a link to your site from one of your forum posts on the Diablo 2 site, and clicked here out of curiosity.  After the main page, the first page I checked out was the Dirty Slang page, and that was enough for one day.  However I found myself returning regularly after that, so I guess you grew on me.

MasPower

More from this email can be seen in the April 2003 Mailbag.

April 5, 2003
I clicked on the link to Blackchampagne.com in your Decahedron #12. The link was labeled 'leet speak' - I was curious as to what page awaited, since I'm not a big fan of it. Anyway, I perused it for a bit, and noticed that there was quite a bit more on this site besides Internet jargon and slang. I wasn't aware that Blackchampagne was actually your site until I reached the 'Where Did You Come From' page.

To make a long letter short (and to keep from rambling because its now 5am instead of 4am), you have a fantastic website, and I look forward to exploring the rest of it tomorrow.

-Rich

 

April 1, 2003
Ya, I wandered over here one night from Diabloii.net when I was tired of making hamburger out of cows. I know, same old story, yet it is your humor and ability to describe your PoV on news items and opinions that keep me returning. I never really have read any other blog sites before yours, and I haven't looked for any afterwards. I just zip by yours every now and again during lunch. It is interesting.

-Boidea

March 16, 2003
I love your columns on diabloii.net and during the whole necro outrage in the forums, I came across the link to your site. 

I really enjoyed the band names thing. That's basically what made me a returning visitor. I really liked your sense of humor. I have read most of the stuff on your page since then. 

I visit once about every week, or when I have time. 

Well, I think that about answers the questions. 

Love your site, keep up the good work.

-Josh-

 

March 15, 2003
I came here from your D2 sites after reading your decahedron. I must say your site is one of the funniest that i've ever been too! You had me in tears laughing. Even though the one article about the bent...well u know did kinda scare me. keep up the good work!

AJM

March 14, 2003
I had seen you link to the blackchampagne website many times, but had never actually taken the time to visit the site. Let me tell you what, it blew me away.

You convey a high level of intelligence in all that you write, but I did have a vision of "Flux" as being the comic book guy from the simpsons. You know, completely oblivious to the world around, only caring about the next star trek convention sort of thing.

I took the time to read what you wrote in your ramblings on the front page today, and you seem to share my amused hatred at political news reporting strategies. The way those people are forced to report puts me in mind of that old Metallica song (eye of the beholder I think), which says -and I haven't heard the song for years, so please excuse the misquote- "Independence, Limited. Freedom of choice is made for you, my friend. Freedom of speech is words that they will bend, Freedom, with their exception." 

As I said, I had never been to this site, but I do plan to come back in the future. And having seen another musing on this site about birth control, let me throw this one at you. How about MANDATORY PASSIVE birth control for women in the WIC or welfare programs? Just a thought.

Donnie

Donnie's suggested topic at the end has been on my notes page for about six months, but I've never yet been seized by the desire to write about it.  Maybe someday...

March 13, 2003
As for how I first got to your site, I came from www.diabloii.net. I was looking at the columns one night, and I started reading the Decahedron. Then I read through one of your stories (the Hallowe'en one I think), saw a link to www.BlackChampagne.com, and decided to take a look.

I started out with some of the articles, found them hilarious, then looked through basically the whole site over the next few days. I read through the home page every day now, and I periodically go back over the articles, just to refresh my memory and have a good laugh again. Still haven't worked through any of the short stories, unfortunately, although if they're as good as the writing you've linked to from the Decahedron, I'm sure I should.

Matthew

 

March 13, 2003
Like many others, I arrived at BlackChampagne indirectly from visiting the Diabloii.net site. My cousin told me of Diabloii, and i would go there occasionally to check up on rumors of the 1.1 patch coming out or how to make my MFSorc roxor. I read your Decahedron one day over christmas break, I think it was 5 worst\best monsters, and after having a good laugh at how you described Izual and Baal I decided to make sure and look up your articles for the weeks to come. This became sort of a ritual and I found myself being more interested in whether your new article was out than what was on Diabloii. ( When you said you'd be posting bi-weekly it was a damn shame.) But, that was before knowing about this site. One of your articles on Diabloii.net had a link to BlackChampagne and I figured I'd open it up and check it out after I read what you had to say about the best changes from D1 to D2. I eventually started reading your "blog" and was very entertained. I enjoyed reading the review for Brotherhood of the Wolf, by the way. Just by seeing the topics discussed in the left column of your site I can tell I have a lot to keep me busy. I guess it will give me something to do while I'm waiting for the next installment of your Decahedron.

Matt

I used to get mails from people saying how they first found the site, and they were from search engines and stuff.  I replied and enjoyed their mails, but didn't save them.  Then one day, months later, I thought of making up this page, and asked for people to send in their origin stories.  And since then practically everyone has said they came from the D2 site, via my column there.  Which, for some reason, makes me feel like a rip off of myself.

March 8, 2003
I had been a regular visitor to diabloii.net for a few months.. Then you started writing your "decahedron" column. I found it to be quite humorous, and enjoyed your writing. so last night.. Feb 23rd, i believe, i was searching around diabloii.net for some more of your stuff, and found the link in your info page to this site. So, I came, and started wandering about. Being the horny 16 year old that I am who was dumped by a... *ahem*, witch of a girlfriend 4 days ago (almost 2 years, she ended it for no good reason..), i immediately went to the Anna Kournakova and Boobies articles, but quickly got bored with those, and moved onto some of the slang terms, and then started paging through some of your past.. blogs, i suppose. I thought it was some funny stuff, so i added it to my favorite places, and now im paging thru all sorts of older stuff on the site. And over the past two days.. I've visited daily, I suppose. Keep up the good work! 

 

March 3, 2003
I'm another of the horde which flocked over to Black Champagne directly from your Diablo2 profile. Basically since I read your first article I found myself thinking "who the hell is this guy"... and after I read a few more D2 columns I was hooked (although it would be more flattering to say you got my interest instantly, it did take a bit).

My relationship with Black Champagne was much more instant. I visited once and read a daily article. Then the essay. Then some other invectives. And finally I bookmarked BC (although I find that I've never needed it since typing a "b" into the address line usually selects your site immediately....) and after that you and I had some brief contact via email. I've actually shown it to many of my friends, some of which have become occasional visitors.

Fuse

 

February 12, 2003
A Google search for a Diablo II strategy guide beget Diabloii.net which beget "Flux's Author Profile" which beget a link to BlackChampagne.com.

When I first saw the sight, my stream of consciousness was something along the lines of:

[...what's a flux oh real content i like purple maybe should be darker though nice site easy to navigate almost time to play diablo again what's up with band names funny article there i don't agree with that one bookmark don't forget time to go make mental note to come back later this site's too good to end up on somethingawful.com...]

After the home page, I previewed most (all) of the other main pages. I wanted to take my time through the fiction short stories so I simply glanced at those to get some sense of your writing style. The various social commentary articles amused me although if we ever had a chance to talk, we would have to discuss (<ahem> debate?) some of your conclusions.

I became a regular visitor after the first visit. I check out the home page every day and when I have the time, try to read more of your fiction/articles.

Malaya

Malaya's mail was part of a longer email which lead to other emails which lead to instant messaging which lead to the story time recounted in this update which lead to me visiting her twice in mid-2003, and moving up to the Bay Area to live with her in August 2003.  As of March 2004, we're still going strong.

February 7, 2003
I've been visiting your page (note the use of the word 'page', I refuse to conform and say blog) for about 4 weeks now. Like oh so many others, I enjoyed your writing on D2.net and decided to see what else you had done. After reading the daily update I continued into articles and ended up browsing the old archives. I am proud to say with ammunition gleaned from your site I had yet another argument with my crazed bible thumping family. Being a professed who-cares myself, its nice to see a similar viewpoint explained occasionally, dare I say it, most eloquently. And your random bouts of dickishness coupled with sheer comedic genius usually leave me giggling maniacally in my little cubicle at work.

Azuth

He's technically incorrect, but the word "blog" has been quite corrupted, so that actually might make him completely correct. It's technically short for "web log", and was initially used for a sort of live journal page, which is pretty much what I do here.  Longer form writing, with some more thought (in theory) given to it.  "Blogs" generally have lots more news links and much less essaying, and they do not have content pages or fiction or other such stuff, at least not very often.  I just call this a "blog" since that's the term in vogue currently, and even non-Internet types seem to have a clue what that is, making it a handy and quick description.  Even if it's slightly inaccurate, and becoming rather cliché.

January 25, 2003
I don't remember exactly what I was searching for on Google, but one of the results was for a page on your site, and the domain name caught my eye.  It was New Year's Day 2003 and I was lying around nursing a hangover, and had just seen the Eddie Murphy movie, Coming to America.  One of the characters he did in that movie was named "Sexual Chocolate" and your site's name reminded me of that, so I was interested enough to look around.  I don't even remember what page I first saw, but I started reading some of the daily updates and really liked your writing style and got curious to see what you looked like.  I've been a regular visitor ever since, and have read lots of the content pages.

-Kay

Kay's entry was written by me, since her original account of it came over ICQ after we'd been chatting for a couple of weeks, and I don't have those messages anymore to quote directly from.  Her initial visit and email were detailed in an update on January 7th, 2003.  With sexy pictures.  Woot.

January 2003
G'day. If you'd remember, I'm one of the many who replied to your story about umm.. can't remember which one. Anyway, yea that was how I chanced upon your website and until now I frequent it to read about interesting news you've picked and the Flux's Decahedron. And I find it sorta interesting and yet in some sense morbid and ironic. Anyway, keep it going and rock on

Angelus

An Aussie, by the sound of things.  Not that there's anything wrong with that. (He wrote back to say he's from Singapore, "G'day" or not.)

January 2003
I found your site while reading your line of articles on diabloii.net. I fell out of my seat on multiple occasions from your humor articles there, and I found that you had a personal page (on your bio of course). I went there, read some (and later all) of your articles, and I agreed with most of them (I am somewhat of a religious person, so your religious articles were a bit "atheist" for me, but you made some great points nonetheless). And when I wasn't nodding my head in agreement I was falling out of my seat again. Thanks to you I have gone through 4 computer chairs since Dec. 20th, 2002! (j/k!) In short, you're a great writer with great opinions and a great sense of humor...keep it up!

ReaperX

Just a few of these so far, but the list will grow with your help.  Send me the story of your first time.  It does not have to be positive, it would be interesting if you hated the site initially, but returned out of some morbid curiosity or boredom, and came to like it.  Or not.  Etc.